Stick it to me

Dear Amber,

There are 2 bumper stickers on the rear of my Nissan Versa; they are both round, they are the same size, placed parallel to one another and are placed strategically on the hatchback.  Bumper sticker #1 represents my love of the Pittsburgh Penguins.  Bumper sticker #2 is made by Life is Good and reads "Life is good, enjoy the ride," it also has a colorful cartoon drawing of a cyclist.  That is plenty for me. 

 I do not understand a person's desire to wear their political, religious, or environmental beliefs on the exterior of their vehicle.  

Amber, how much personal information should we be revealing in the form of bumper stickers?  Like the stick figure family bumper stickers, they are adorable, but does the whole world need to know your family size and demographic, likes and dislikes just because they can see the rear of your vehicle?

Dear Sarah,

I mostly agree with you here.  My husband, Superman, is especially annoyed by the stick figure family bumper stickers.  ESPECIALLY when they have the childrens' names with the stickers.  He says they are like an abductor's dream come true "Hey, this is my kids' name!  Come and lure him away!"

We do have a few stickers.  A VB sticker (hometown represent!), a Cincinnati Red's sticker, a Cardinal's World Series champ stickers (yes, we are a household divided when it comes to baseball), and a sticker from one of Superman's favorite places in the world: Ace Adventure Resort.  But all of these stickers are on the glass, because they are removable that way. I would never put a bumper sticker on my actual bumper, or god forbid, the paint! 

And I would never ever put on political stickers.  And here is why...  When I find out someone is a Republican, it makes me like them a little bit less.  Sorry, I know that is terrible to say, but it's true. (And what is this blog if not us being candid.)  And I reason that if learning someone is Republican makes me like them less, I reckon that learning I'm a Democrat might make me less favorable to some people.  So, I keep those personal opinions to myself and choose not to display them on my car or in my front yard.

But in the age of social networking and constant digital media, we are a society that as a whole loves to put all of our stuff out there.  Our thoughts, opinions, family dynamics...we think that people really care if we love our schnauzer.  Or if they don't care, that they should because schnauzers are the best ever!  We share every thought we have on facebook, or twitter, or our blogs on blogger.com!  Why shouldn't we share out thoughts on abortion and gun control on our bumpers for the whole highway to see?

Is it conceit?  Delusion?

With all of that being said...  I love reading funny bumper stickers.  Especially ones that parody other cliche bumper stickers, like:  "My other car is a broom." "If you can read this, I'm not impressed. Most people can read." "I'm only speeding because I have to poo."  "I bet Jesus would have used his turn signals."  And my favorites:

Now, I don't actually put these bumper stickers on my car, but I do enjoy reading them on other people's.

Plus, those bumper sticker designers and manufacturers have to feed their stick figure children too!